Super Minneapolis

Super Minneapolis 2016-06-28

The one where we meet Wildman

Ian had an argument with Rufus about the outfit that he’s been assigned. Apparently he doesn’t like the white spandex unitard.—

Rufus took us to a gravel pit in Maple Grove. There’s a giant bulldozer. Mr. Jones is slouching next to the van, scribbling notes. Apparently this is our new outdoor Danger Room. Ironhead makes lots of gravel out of boulders and lets them shoot him with giant guns. They make us do stuff to show off our powers.

While we’re working out, a circular portal opens in the middle of the quarry and a man falls out of the portal obviously exhausted. He’s followed by 6 people/creatures who are all gray, with gray helmets and ray guns who are wearing jetpacks. They are about 4.5 feet tall, but are built wrong, legs and arms not quite in the right places.

Darkman and Sunspot both recognize the dude who came out of the portal and call him “Lucas.”

Everyone gets ready for a fight and Drunkman throws his empty whisky bottle at them and yells something about them killing his family. The gray dudes fly into the air and fired their ray guns at Drunkman and Ironhead. Drunkman goes down with two holes in his torso and Ironhead takes a blast to the face. It’s on now!

Sunspot shot all of the guns with his pew pew light rays, causing two of them to fly from their owner’s hands and a third to start emitting sparks. Suddenly a boulder disappears from the field an reappears above one of the bad guys, smooshing him. I made one of the guns malfunction and it exploded, killing the gray dude holding the gun. He killed our depressed friend, so he deserved it.

Darkman made a Van Halen symbol from dark matter and flung it at the bad guys, hitting two of them, and knocking one of them about. They shoot at people, and one of them throws what looks like a grenade, creating a 12 foot portal in the air above it. We continued fighting the bad guys, but I noticed that Drunkman is smoking a cigaret, it seems he’s not dead even with two giant holes in his chest. Ironhead grabbed one of the gray dudes, restraining it, but the rest of the them escaped through the grenate portal.

Now that we have time, we take a look at Lucas, who appears to be medium build, indeterminate ethnic status, and wearing tattered business casual cloths. He’s like a totally forgettable homeless guy. The gray dude touched something on his wrist, causing it to start beeping. Ironhead ripped it from his wrist and threw it because it seems to be about to blow up.

Apparently this Lucas Dupont dude was working at S.T.A.R. Labs with Sunspot and Darkman when the “experiment” exploded, that’s how they know him. He says that he’s been at the Rio Grande for a couple of days. He’s been missing for months.

A helicopter with 8 special forces guys lands and point guns at Lucas and the gray dude. Mr. Jones tries to get Lucas onto the helicopter, but Darkman and Drunkman tell him not to go because he’ll be put in a secret facility and brainwashed to be a super operative. Darkman grabs Lucas and goes through one of his dark portals.

When we got back to the Federal Building, we found Lucas and Darkman waiting there for us. Rufus tells us confidentially that the police know that people are being disappeared. Much discussion ensues during which Ian and George thought they noticed something in the corner, but when they looked again nothing was there. We decided that Lucas needs to have a very public outing as a super hero so that he won’t be disappeared. We all started through a portal that Lucas created, but just as Ironhead and Drunkman walk to the portal, they are knocked aside apparently by a shadow.

We came out of the portal in the Minnesota Wild locker room. We had heard something attack the two at the end of the marching order, so Darkman created a black portal and said something like “We need to get back there!” Sunspot and I jumped into the black portal.

Lucas strapped on some skates, threw a MN Wild jersey around his shoulders, and skated out between periods, jumping around the rink and turning himself into Wildman!

Something hit Ironhead with a stun gun. When Ironhead tried to knock the stun-gun away, he missed. Drunkman did something to the shadow-man, who turned into a regular special forces dude.

He tried to turn back into shadow and ended up wrapped in dark ribbons exuded by Darkman. I absorbed the power from the stun gun, and the guy shot from the dark bands and into the wall. Darkman put him in a sphere cage of darkness.

I called 911 to come and arrest the dude, and Darkman revealed that he knows this guy from a special forces unit that Darkman used to be in. The guy got pissed and said something like “George, don’t say a word or I’ll personally take care of you.” The police arrived, and Drunkman knocked out the special forces dude so they could take him away.

We argued with Mr. Jones about the constitutional rights of Affected people. I think that people should be aprehended and tried for their crimes, not disappeared into some secret government facility. It did not go well.

Wildman showed up again, still pretty exhilerated from his fun adventure at the game. Now that he’s a public figure, he’s going to join the team.

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